If you Google what the number one fear across the world is you would be surprised to learn that it’s actually public speaking! It has been the number one thing on the list for God knows how long. So of ALL the fears in the world, ya gotta wonder why is this one the biggest one of them all?
When you are a public speaker all eyes are on you, solely. So it’s the fear of making a mistake and/or being rejected, laughed at, and judged. So when it really boils down to it we’re not afraid of the speaking, we’re actually afraid of the public. But why?
I want to know at what point in life do we go from being a child who eats his/her food with their hands to being afraid of how people may react to us speaking? I mean, we were all children once. We all got food on our face, played in the dirt, at the dirt, wore five different color co-ordinations when we got dressed, and instead of fearing people, we actually did crazy things for their attention. So at what point does it become a fear rather than a natural human tendency? At what point do we decide that we don’t want to try and get people to laugh cause, well, they may not laugh with us but rather AT us?
And it’s not only public speaking. I think we all have a fear of being judged. Think of every situation in life that makes you uncomfortable based on someone else involved. Fear of having sex with the lights on, first impressions, taking a step towards your dreams, etc (you get the point).
Imagine now a life where it didn’t matter. You never worried about what one person or a thousand people or a million people thought of you. They want to obsess over your failures, let them! Why should you? Why should it bother you when at some point in life we all fail? Why should it even matter what others think?
There are moments that do matter and those are the moments that deserve our attention. But there are so many other moments that should NOT matter. It should NOT matter what other parents think of your parenting. It should NOT matter if someone across the room is pointing fingers at the zit that just popped up on your face last night. It should not matter if you fail at something as long as YOU know that you’re going to get back up and try again.
It’s insane, when I think about it, that other human beings are building the path to my journey in this lifetime. That other human beings who fuck up, who fail, who don’t try at all, who aren’t perfect (oh, did I mention that’s all mankind!) are the ones who get in my way and I let them. I waste time thinking about what everyone else thinks, what they want, what they expect of me…and yet at the end of the day not ONCE have I asked myself what it is I want. Where I want to go. What I want to experience.That may sound selfish and if it does, then good!
I could go on and on but I think I have left a mouthful here already! Plus, as I type this my two year old is being mischievous. So I better go!